Thoughts are the foundation that help create our lives.

Much of our stress and emotional suffering comes from the way we think. Thoughts are the foundation that helps to create our lives. When there are a myriad of distorted, negative and unrealistic ones, the foundation cracks and we end up feeling crazed and humorless. Much of the way we think  is akin to a plane on autopilot. We forget that we can take the controls and navigate ourselves, but it is so much easier not to. Years of conditioning have created automatic responses. Think of some of the situations you’ve encountered. You’re in the parking lot looking for a space. You can’t seem to find one so you begin to assume that “something is going on”. You don’t know what it is, but why else would you be having so much trouble finding a spot. The more you ride around the more frustrated you get. Since you’ve convinced yourself you will probably not be able to find a space, you’re only focus is to continue to” not find one”. Even if there was one right in front of your eyes you wouldn’t see it. Let’s say you go to the movies and your intention is to make sure you find a seat with no one in front of you. Let’s face it, everyone is looking for the “right seat”.  A young couple with children sit in front of you and they all have big heads and lots of hair. You start thinking, ”Oh no!, not again!, This always happens to me. It never fails, I always get people in front of me with fat heads. You could move if there are other seats, but sometimes we become so trapped by our distortions that we can’t focus on looking for another seat. We would rather continue the drama by escalating the negativity. “Now my night is ruined”. “That’s it, I’m never going to the movies again”. We lose total perspective and make announcements that are geared to enhance our inability to make rational choices. The chances that you will never go to another movie until the day you die is ludicrous. I do less of the above, but every once in awhile I get into my “stinking thinking”, especially when I can’t find something. The other day I found one of the pair of shoes I wanted to wear. I was convinced someone took the other one, but who could that be? I don’t think my partner Kenny is interested in wearing one black high heel. But then who knows. I finally found it under the bed, but not until I drove myself nuts. Oh well, I’m not perfect!

 

About lorettalaroche

An international stress management and humor consultant whose wit, and irreverent humor, has, for over 30 years raised the humor potential in all of us. She is on the Mass General advisory council for anxiety and depression and was recently awarded the National Humor Treasure Award. Loretta writes a weekly newspaper column called, ‘Get a Life’.

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